SEXUAL INTIMACY

Some families are highly conservative on sexual issues; it is treated with utmost modesty and never discussed or mentioned. Some adults who came from such disciplined background sometimes encounters sex –related problems in marriage. This hang up should be discarded in marriage as they may hurt the marriage. Withholding sex from your partner is unbiblical, against God’s design, and plan for sex in marriage. Some grew up with personal discipline and conviction, they grew up chaste and sexually virtuous and this is carried over into their marriage. Even though this is laudable, they should prayerfully loosen- up. Sexual relationship between husband and wife is holy and proper.

Sex is one thing you can share only with each other. Do not expose your husband to unnecessary temptation by withholding it from him. Extra marital sex is sinful; remember your husband is a human being with blood running in his veins. If you do, you are exposing him to sin and may lead him to hell if he does, you will be held accountable to God.

Do not use sex as a weapon against him either no matter how upset you are with him, withholding your body will not solve the problem, it may drive him further away from you and aggravate the problem [1Cor.7:4-5]. The marriage bed is not a place to show propriety either, trying to show him that you are not promiscuous. Having sex with your husband is not promiscuous, be free and be yourself.

Your body belongs to him and his body belongs to you make conscious effort not to wear yourself out during the day, be mentally and physically prepared for your husband. In some cases, the husband sexually neglects the wife; his lack of interest may be due to many reasons, which could be physical, mental, or emotional. If there is no physical problem hindering him, he may be having deep feelings of failure, disappointments, depression, or hopelessness that needs to be addressed. Prayer can help reveal what the problem is and how to solve it. Do not let negative emotions like resentments, bitterness, self pity and unforgiveness build up in you, keep your self healthy and attractive.

Get special lingerie that you know he will like and get yourself spruced up. Surprise him with a new attitude. Sometimes sexual problems in marriage happen because of sexual experiences before the marriage or in the past. Pray to be set free of those memories no matter what occurred in either of your past.